I Got Rhythm - Bobby Darin
Hospital Beds - Cold War Kids
I'm going to take a week off from the "Thankful Thursday" posts and write some thing a little different for this Thursday. Just to reassure you all, this post is not to try get more people to tell me "Happy birthday". I just wanted to share some thoughts and reflections on gaining another year.
Welp, ladies and gents, I'm officially in my 30's. Now, I know some who are no longer in their 30's are saying, "Oh gosh, she's still just a baby!", and others who are not may be saying, "Good gravy, Miss Mavie! She's so old!" (For some reason, I'm imagining them saying this with the Sultan's voice from Aladdin...don't know why...). I remember someone telling a while back that one of their friends had a really tough time turning 31. Not 30, but 31. The reason being is that now they were in their 30's and all that that implies. When they first told me that, I was all "Pssshhhtt, what's the big deal?!" Now I can kind of understand what they were saying. For me, it's not about growing older. I could care less about that. Some of the most awesome people I know are in their 40's or older...much, much older. No, it's just that I never expected my life to turn out the way it has back when I was 18, which is kinda weird, rather terrifying, but super cool all at the same time.
At 18, I think most people have this whole plan laid out for themselves about how the future is going to go for them. I know I did. I thought that I was going to go to school to become either an English teacher or a youth counselor. I thought that I would have traveled to Europe by now. I thought that I would be working in one of my planned professions. I thought that I would be married with possibly a little rugrat or two... Instead life to date has turned out pretty much the exact opposite of what I planned. Heavy emphasis on the "what I planned" here. I had my plans, but the Lord had His plans. His, as always, prevailed, and for that I'm extremely grateful.
First, my plans to teach or counsel. Those did not pan out. Nope, they didn't pan out at all, and it's good that they didn't. I'm not cut out to teach in a class room setting. Lord bless all of those of you who do. I learned this through a few years of VBS, Children's church, and Sunday school. I enjoyed teaching in those capacities, but I've found that I much prefer one on one interaction with people. "So, why didn't you go into counseling if you like working with one person at a time?" you might ask. Well, I really did think for a while that was the direction that the Lord was taking me, but He had another idea for me. He, instead, put me in the job that I still hold to this day. As most people know, I'm an optician, and have been for almost eight years. This is a job that I never thought I would have. It's a technical job, filled with math and bits of science and engineering. In school, I never liked any of the practical studies. Give me a Shakespearean sonnet, a Peloponnesian war, or jambalaya recipe any day, but...I love my job. I get to work with tons of different people. Sometimes, some of my patients do open up to me and share their troubles and struggles. I get to encourage them, pray for them, and help them. Talk about a blessing.
Second, Europe. Oh, Europe. I've wanted to travel that continent for as long as I remember (especially the British Isles!). I haven't made it there, yet, but hopefully one day I will. While I haven't been to Europe, I have traveled around all of the western US. That's pretty awesome, I must say. Especially, when I have peers who haven't even left Montana! So yes, Europe is still a far off dream, but in return I've seen some spectacular landscapes across our country.
Third, marriage and family. This one is a tender subject, and probably my greatest struggle at understanding the Lord's plan for my life. It's very hard being single and being one of the few in my circle of friends that isn't in a relationship. I'll be honest. I've shed a lot of tears over this. It hurts always being alone. I ache at times for that intimate relationship with another person that my married friends have. I'm not just talking about sex. There is so much more to a married relationship than sex. I'm talking about those shared glances, the inside jokes, curling up to next to each other watching a movie, deep conversations, nerding out over a favorite television show, sliding your arm around the other's waist as you walk down the sidewalk, holding hands as you stroll down the aisle at Target, or the soft kiss given as you pass the other in the kitchen.
Now, yes, I realize that marriage is not sparkles, butterflies, and caramel kisses all the time. I know there are times that your spouse drive you nuts, and if he/she snores all night long again your pillow over their face is a tempting, tempting thought. It's hard work, but if you're willing to put the time into it, it can be one of the most beautiful things God created. I do so long for the man the Lord has for me, but I've come to realize that I have to wait on Him. I cannot rush ahead of Him just to soothe my heart because in the long run that wouldn't soothe anything. The hurt I could do to my heart and someone's heart by not waiting is not worth it. I had a dear friend tell one me time, "Why settle for just okay, when God has something great for you? You just can't see it yet." Wow. Talk about throwing the breaks on the pity party bus! Those two little sentences helped change my view of singleness. It made me decide to wait on God. Yes, I know that I'll still have those late night cry fests (sometimes, a girl just needs a good cry, mmmkay?). Yes, seeing a cute couple holding hands will make me look away and sigh with longing, but I know that I just need to wait a while longer. God's got me in the palm of His hand. Where else would I want to be?
Okay, there's my thoughts to date on turning 31. Anyone else out there with thoughts on growing older? I would love to hear them!
Manda
Second, Europe. Oh, Europe. I've wanted to travel that continent for as long as I remember (especially the British Isles!). I haven't made it there, yet, but hopefully one day I will. While I haven't been to Europe, I have traveled around all of the western US. That's pretty awesome, I must say. Especially, when I have peers who haven't even left Montana! So yes, Europe is still a far off dream, but in return I've seen some spectacular landscapes across our country.
Third, marriage and family. This one is a tender subject, and probably my greatest struggle at understanding the Lord's plan for my life. It's very hard being single and being one of the few in my circle of friends that isn't in a relationship. I'll be honest. I've shed a lot of tears over this. It hurts always being alone. I ache at times for that intimate relationship with another person that my married friends have. I'm not just talking about sex. There is so much more to a married relationship than sex. I'm talking about those shared glances, the inside jokes, curling up to next to each other watching a movie, deep conversations, nerding out over a favorite television show, sliding your arm around the other's waist as you walk down the sidewalk, holding hands as you stroll down the aisle at Target, or the soft kiss given as you pass the other in the kitchen.
Now, yes, I realize that marriage is not sparkles, butterflies, and caramel kisses all the time. I know there are times that your spouse drive you nuts, and if he/she snores all night long again your pillow over their face is a tempting, tempting thought. It's hard work, but if you're willing to put the time into it, it can be one of the most beautiful things God created. I do so long for the man the Lord has for me, but I've come to realize that I have to wait on Him. I cannot rush ahead of Him just to soothe my heart because in the long run that wouldn't soothe anything. The hurt I could do to my heart and someone's heart by not waiting is not worth it. I had a dear friend tell one me time, "Why settle for just okay, when God has something great for you? You just can't see it yet." Wow. Talk about throwing the breaks on the pity party bus! Those two little sentences helped change my view of singleness. It made me decide to wait on God. Yes, I know that I'll still have those late night cry fests (sometimes, a girl just needs a good cry, mmmkay?). Yes, seeing a cute couple holding hands will make me look away and sigh with longing, but I know that I just need to wait a while longer. God's got me in the palm of His hand. Where else would I want to be?
Okay, there's my thoughts to date on turning 31. Anyone else out there with thoughts on growing older? I would love to hear them!
Manda
